Showing posts with label self care. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self care. Show all posts
Monday, August 1, 2011
A question popped into my head that I paused to ponder, despite the numerous tasks on my list waiting to be checked off (or more likely moved to the next day’s list)… how does one really describe self-care, fostering resilience, burnout avoidance, spirituality, humanities…? You get the idea.
When I think about them, it strikes me that they have large areas of overlap and often are one and the same. What helps us to keep doing what we are doing? What brings us joy? What helps us to be energized in our work and in our personal lives? What gives us a sense of peace and meaning? What helps us remember why we went into this field in the first place?
I’ve had a line from a song stuck in my head lately, one I hadn’t heard in a long time. Finally, while working at my desk, I listened to it. It is music which was gifted to me by Dale Lupu and sung by a lovely folk duet called A Glass of Water. The song is called “The Summer Day (Thompson)” and the lyrics are:
I don’t know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention,
How to fall down into the grass,
How to kneel down in the grass,
How to be idle and blessed,
How to stroll through the fields,
Which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn’t everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one, wild, and precious life?
Monday, August 1, 2011 0
Sunday, June 13, 2010
One of my favorite bands, Nada Surf, recently came out with a new album of covers and to whet my appetite before I could get my hands on some digital mp3's I went back to some of their old albums and listened to them all the way through. One song kept sticking out to me because a few lines really resonated with a convergence of work/family overload I recently experienced. But as I dug out from that overload I started to see the song differently and through the eyes of some of the family members of patients who were dying.
Here is a video of Nada Surf performing "Do It Again" live in a record store (there is no official video and check out the cool drum box the drummer is using, it is called a cajon and is very fun to play!):
The main lyric that first caught my attention was near the end of the song when the energy picks up from the mid tempo relaxed arrangement used for most of the song. The lyric is:
Maybe this weight was a gift / Like I had to see what I could lift
I spend all my energy / Walking upright
This resonated deeply with me in my own experience as I noted above, but again placing that lyric in the mindset of our patients' families makes the other lyrics start to come alive.
The first verse perfectly describes a common situation I have seen where a family member or friend of a dying patient is attentive and wanting to help but doesn't have a good framework of what would help best for someone who is dying. And during that time, they tell me they often feel exhausted, bored, anxious, on alert, and ineffective.
Well I'd snap to attention / If I thought that you knew the way
I'd open my mouth / If I had something smart to say /
I bought a stack of books / I didn't read a thing
It's like I'm sitting here / Waiting for birds to sing
The last line of the first verse echoes many other references to birds and death as Amy has pointed out in a blog post on 'Bird hits the window.'
The azalea reference in the second verse was one I was not familiar with until I started researching this song in depth for this post. Some of the meanings for Azalea flowers include:
Interestingly the name of the album is 'The Weight is a Gift.' Which also echoes a sentiment I hear from patients, families and staff, which is that 'God will not give us more (weight) than one can handle.' This saying may be rooted in I Corinthians 10:13:- temperance
- passion
- womanhood (China)
- take care of yourself for me
- fragility
You're lying down / And the moon is sideways
And I like the masking noise quiet / Of your breathing nearby
No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.While it mentions temptations and not more specifically trials, you could see the basic sentiment exists that has launched many self-help books. People endure many different hardships throughout their life and eventually most get through it but they have changed, some for good and some for worse. How one emerges from the tough times is up to the individual and their support system, but it may sometimes turn out that 'the weight was a gift.' Just don't tell that too them in the middle of their journey. That is only something that should be self-discovered.
Lyrics: (2005 Barsuk Records - The Weight is a Gift)
Well I'd snap to attention / If I thought that you knew the way
I'd open my mouth / If I had something smart to say
I bought a stack of books / I didn't read a thing
It's like I'm sitting here / Waiting for birds to sing
Let's do it again
Come on let's do it again
Please let's do it again
The hum of the clock / Is a far-away place
The azalea air holding your face / You're lying down
And the moon is sideways / (From the hot to the cold It never gets old)
I spend all my energy / Staying upright
And I like the masking noise quiet / Of your breathing nearby
I want you lazy science / I want some peace
Are you the future? / Show me the keys
When I accelerate / I remember why it's good to be alive / Like a twenty-five cent game
Maybe this weight was a gift / Like I had to see what I could lift
I spend all my energy / Walking upright
Sunday, June 13, 2010 9
Monday, February 23, 2009
This is not what I originally intended to post this week. Just something I felt like I needed to write today. Some self care.
The past few weeks I have been busy. Every day going from one task to another. Family meeting... Extubation... Team meeting... All tasks I needed to accomplish in order to get through another day. Even days I have off I fill more more tasks. Take the cat to vet... Organize taxes... Clean house...
Today, as I rushed into my office, just dropping something off on my way to a family meeting, I found a card laying on a stack of mail I hadn't gotten to in the past week (or two). I was in a hurry, so I don't really know why I opened it at that time, but I did. (Maybe because it was a pale pink color and I don't often get pink mail.) It was a Thank You card from a patient's family. I had taken care of their family member in the hospital when he had died a few weeks (maybe months) ago. I get Thank You cards from time to time, but this one made me pause. I think it was more because of when I was reading it rather than what I was reading.
Something popped into my head that I hadn't thought of in a long time. There is a poem I memorized in 7th grade. We had to pick a Robert Frost poem to recite, so I memorized it (bonus points I think, yeah I was like that). Even though it kind of stuck with me, I don't think I ever really thought about what it means. It suddenly made a lot of sense.
Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening
Whose woods these are I think I know,
His house is in the village though.
He will not see me stopping here,
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer,
To stop without a farmhouse near,
Between the woods and frozen lake,
The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake,
To ask if there is some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep,
Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
As I stood in my office with the card in hand, I stopped for just a minute. I gave a few moments to that patient and his family. He was more than just a task. I gave a moment to myself. Not really a moment to enjoy, but a moment to appreciate.
Then I was off to the meeting. After all, they were waiting for me and I still had miles to go before I sleep.
Monday, February 23, 2009 3
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
