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One of my favorite bands, Nada Surf, recently came out with a new album of covers and to whet my appetite before I could get my hands on some digital mp3's I went back to some of their old albums and listened to them all the way through.  One song kept sticking out to me because a few lines really resonated with a convergence of work/family overload I recently experienced.  But as I dug out from that overload I started to see the song differently and through the eyes of some of the family members of patients who were dying.


Here is a video of Nada Surf performing "Do It Again" live in a record store (there is no official video and check out the cool drum box the drummer is using, it is called a cajon and is very fun to play!):



The main lyric that first caught my attention was near the end of the song when the energy picks up from the mid tempo relaxed arrangement used for most of the song.  The lyric is:

Maybe this weight was a gift / Like I had to see what I could lift

Interestingly the name of the album is 'The Weight is a Gift.'  Which also echoes a sentiment I hear from patients, families and staff, which is that 'God will not give us more (weight) than one can handle.'  This saying may be rooted in I Corinthians 10:13:

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

While it mentions temptations and not more specifically trials, you could see the basic sentiment exists that has launched many self-help books.  People endure many different hardships throughout their life and eventually most get through it but they have changed, some for good and some for worse.  How one emerges from the tough times is up to the individual and their support system, but it may sometimes turn out that 'the weight was a gift.'  Just don't tell that too them in the middle of their journey.  That is only something that should be self-discovered.

Lyrics: (2005 Barsuk Records - The Weight is a Gift)
Well I'd snap to attention / If I thought that you knew the way
I'd open my mouth / If I had something smart to say
I bought a stack of books / I didn't read a thing
It's like I'm sitting here / Waiting for birds to sing

Let's do it again
Come on let's do it again
Please let's do it again

The hum of the clock / Is a far-away place
The azalea air holding your face / You're lying down
And the moon is sideways / (From the hot to the cold It never gets old)

I spend all my energy / Staying upright
And I like the masking noise quiet / Of your breathing nearby

I want you lazy science / I want some peace
Are you the future? / Show me the keys

When I accelerate / I remember why it's good to be alive / Like a twenty-five cent game
Maybe this weight was a gift / Like I had to see what I could lift
I spend all my energy / Walking upright

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Have you heard people talk about this? At the hospice place where I work, I sometimes hear a nurse, or even a family member say, "A bird hit the window this morning, I'm sure mom's getting ready to go soon." In fact, it's not unusual to have a day when several rooms have a constant barrage of tapping from birds flying into the glass.

I was surprised to see how entrenched this symbol of the bird is in our culture. In case it's a new idea for you let me explain:

"Bird flies at the window, Death knocks at the door" is a phrase that has been repeated by kids for centuries. The roots of this reach far back. Because of their ability to fly, birds have eternally been connected with the heavens/afterlife. Birds aren't just associated with death, but life as well, as in the common story that a Stork delivers new babies into this world.

There really is no culture exempt. In Egypt, China and Japan the Phoenix symbolizes rebirth, from ancient myths of the bird constantly being reborn. In Syria, Eagles are on tombs to lead the souls in the afterlife. In the Jewish and Christian culture, it is the dove that represents the soul. Both the Celts and Greeks believed the soul would reappear as a bird after death. There is an Islamic tradition that believes that dead souls remain as birds until judgment day, whereas the Hindu's use birds to symbolize the form the soul takes in between earthly lives.

With so many cultures viewing birds as the representation of human souls, you can guess when a bird suddenly acts strangely, we take notice. Before there were glass windows, the superstition was that if a bird flew into your house and perched on someone's chair, then a death would occur within that home in a year's time. Now, not too many birds make it inside, but all it takes is the unusual event of a bird trying to get in, hitting the glass pane, and then when an untimely death occurs the two events become connected.

Such was the case for Lucille Ball, who at the age of 3 recalled that a bird flew in her house and became trapped the day her father died. She was so convinced of this superstition that she refused to stay in hotels that had bird wallpaper or pictures of birds on the walls.

Some may wonder is one type of bird more ominous with this superstition? It seems there are several to worry about. In the Cherokee tradition it is a red bird that provides the connection with the deceased. The Red Bird Center provides the story behind this belief. The other birds to be leery of if they are trying to fly in your house are the sparrow, the robin and the raven.

Anyone with stories of their own?


References:
http://www.snopes.com/oldwives/bird.asp
http://www.mythencyclopedia.com/Be-Ca/Birds-in-Mythology.html

Pictures used: "Bird in Hand" Victor Schrager has an entire collection of these here
"Start to finish" from Two Dresses Studios here